Let's talk about feeling happy. Ella shares a memory of her baby sister, and Dr. Lockhart and Nakita discuss how happiness can come with other emotions and feel overwhelming.
Let's talk about feeling happy. Ella shares a memory of her baby sister, and Dr. Lockhart and Nakita discuss how happiness can come with other emotions and feel overwhelming.
You can find out more about Dr. Lockhart and her practice online at anewdaysa.com and on Instagram at @dr.annlouise.lockhart.
You can find Nakita’s book, A Kids Book About Emotions and other kids' books about important topics at akidsco.com
If there’s an emotion you want to share for us to explore, send us a note at listen@akidspodcastabout.com. Check out other podcasts made for kids just like you by visiting akidsco.com.
Everyday Feels: A Kids Podcast About Emotions
S1 EP1, Ella (Happy)
[INTRODUCTION]
Nakita: Hi, I'm Nikita Simpson.
Ann-Louise: And I'm Dr. Lockhart.
Nakita: I wrote a kids book called A Kids Book About Emotions.
Ann-Louise: And I help kids and grownups work through their emotions.
Nakita: This is Everyday Feels, a podcast about emotions for kids and their grownups.
This podcast is better together. Listen with a grownup, with a family member, with a class, or with a friend.
How are you feeling today?
Ann-Louise: Ahh. I'm feeling pretty good. I'm excited. So speaking of how I'm feeling, we're going to feel our feelings, and that's okay. Feelings are good, even the uncomfortable and icky ones. Feelings tell your mind and your body what is going on inside of you and what you need.
Nakita: What do you do when you feel an emotion you don't want to feel?
Ann-Louise: We're going to discuss that today. Are you ready?
Nakita: I sure am. And speaking of feeling our feelings, I think it's time we heard from Ella, from Portland, Oregon, who has a story to share about happiness.
Ella: Hi, my name is Ella, and I'm 11 years old. And I live in Portland, Oregon.
So one of the emotions I'm going to be talking about is happy because my baby sister was born, like five weeks ago and she is a beautiful, healthy little baby girl, and I love her very much. And her name is Everly.
Well, I was at home and I got home and Luke was there, but the baby wasn't and so we had to wait like a few minutes from my mom to come home. But when she came home in the door with the baby, my baby sister, I almost cried because she was just so amazing. And I couldn't even believe that I had a baby sister.
Well, it was a happy cry. Like where you don't cry, but you feel like you're currently crying on the inside for happiness.
Um, well, I was just very anxious for the baby to come and like never knowing when the baby was going to come. And if she, when she did come, what I would do, and like, I was kind of under a little bit of stress because I was going to be a big sister to like just a baby, a little girl.
I feel happy that she's here because like it's just fun every day. And like, I never know when, like, if she's going to do something new, if she's going to laugh or like what, like, it's just kind of exciting every day, even though I can't spend as much time with my mom because she's too occupied with the baby. It's still wonderful.
I feel very proud that I have a baby. I feel very proud that I have a baby sister because. Cause like, she's gonna grow up to be an amazing little baby young woman, even though she's not gonna be a little baby anymore, she's just going to be a young woman. But yeah. And I'm just always excited and sometimes I'm overwhelmed because I have to, like, sometimes stop my school to help, or like, just stop in the middle of what I'm doing. It's kind of stressful, but it's okay.
Nakita: Thanks Ella, for telling us about your baby sister and how happy you were when you met her. I love, love, love the fact that it was so easy for you to share everything that you were feeling, um, how easy it was for you to talk to your grownup about all of the big feelings he felt. And even when you're able to cry.
I think it's so great. When you have a person that you trust in your life that you feel open and able to share everything that's going on inside of you.
Ann-Louise: I agree Nakita because I think it takes so much confidence and bravery and sharing our stories and being vulnerable, because we're trying to normalize, talking about feelings and emotions.
That means that we all have them and it's okay to talk about them because we all feel them.
Nakita: Don't we all. And why don't we take a quick stretch, break, free to shake those wiggles out, get comfortable and get cold. And when we come back, we'll talk about happiness, why we feel it. Why it's so important to our everyday life.
We’ll even give you listeners a chance to share a happiness memory and listen as others around you share their own happiness memories. We’ll continue after the short break.
[AD BREAK]
Nakita: Welcome back to Everyday Feels, a podcast about emotions for kids and their grownups. We just listened to Ella who told us about how happy she was when her baby sister came home. She also expressed other emotions she felt when she began to cry.
Ann-Louise: You know, feeling more than one emotion in a moment is very common.
We're humans with a ton of emotions and we cannot expect to keep them all in separate little cubbies and always be in control of them. That's just not realistic.
Nakita: I love that, Dr. Lockhart. I think we often get the message as kids and grownups to control ourselves so that we feel guilty or even sometimes bad when we're overwhelmed by our emotions.
Do you agree?
Ann-Louise: I absolutely agree. I think it's not just kids that struggle with this. Grownups do, too. And it's easier when we keep our emotions in check. But we end up numbing ourselves. We get kind of like, not in control. We don't understand what's going on after a while and what we're actually feeling, which means we start to lose touch with how we really feel.
None of us want that.
Nakita: Hm. I don't want that either. So let's start getting back in touch with our feelings today and talk about happiness. Dr. Lockhart, what exactly is happiness?
Ann-Louise: That's a great question. Happiness is one of those things that makes people feel good. It's one of those emotions that people actually like.
So happiness is a feeling of joy, of contentment, of excitement, of exuberance. There's all these words that describe happiness. It's makes people squint their eyes when they smile like me and makes their cheeks hurt when they smile real big. Feels good. And happiness is one of those emotions that most people don't shy away from.
They actually like it.
Nakita: Ooh, I like it too. Why do you think it's important for us to experience happiness?
Ann-Louise: I think it's important to experience and feel happiness because we should feel happy when happy things happen. To be in touch with your emotions means to feel the full range of the human experience. That means when you're happy about a good grade or you're happy about a new friend or happy about getting to go to the pool.
That makes sense, because those are happy events.
Nakita: Oh, I love when I get to go out to get ice cream.
Ann-Louise: That’s a good one.
Nakita: But that's just how happy I get.
Now, is it common to feel two emotions at once? Like feeling happy, but also a bit sad or happy and a little jealous?
Ann-Louise: Oh yes, totally. That is what we call ambivalence and ambivalence is when you feel two different emotions at the same time. Maybe even about the same situation or person. And that's a hard one for people, not just kids, but also grownups. And ambivalence is kind of like your two feelings are war with one another and they're kind of like hidden butting heads.
And it doesn't, it's feeling kind of confusing because we don't know why we would feel happy that I have a new sibling and also kind of jealous or scared or worried. Like people feel like it doesn't really make sense. And so for me, I think that when you're going through situations like that, it's really important to give yourself a script.
It's something you say to yourself, like it is normal to feel many feelings at once I am a human being. It is okay to feel feelings. It shows that I'm alive.
Nakita: That is really helpful. I think I'm going to have to try that even today. Oh, you know what? I think we should. Why don't we give everyone listening the opportunity to share a happiness memory with whomever they may be listening with.
Maybe that's a parent or a sibling, an aunt, or a friend, a teacher, or a grownup you trust. And if you're listening by yourself, you can see the memory out loud or just think it to yourself.
Ann-Louise: Nakita. I think that's a fabulous, fabulous suggestion. And what I would suggest is just sit and share that happiness.
Maybe you want to dry it, maybe you want to create a Lego creation. Maybe you just want to talk about it or you could do like a journal share you write something you're grown up, share something, but I encourage you both to take time and take turns in doing it, or just think about it for yourself and then return.
Nakita: All right. Well, here's where you can pause this podcast and share happiness memory with whomever you're listening with. Take as much time as. Dr. Lockhart and I will be waiting right here for you when you're ready to come back.
[REFLECTION BREAK]
Ann-Louise: Why this is so important is because being in touch with your emotions really helps you to feel more like you. So many times we get out of touch with who we are and we forget what we really feel. So when someone says, Hey, how are you doing? We just say fine. And it's more than that. So really talk about what this emotion means to you, what happiness means to you and share maybe times that you feel happiest.
So we'll be here when you return.
Ann-Louise: Welcome back. We're so glad you had the opportunity to maybe share by yourself or with your grownup about happiness and your emotions. And we hope that was a really, really productive time for the both of you.
[WRAP-UP]
Nakita: Thanks again to Ella from Portland, Oregon for sharing us. Oh, well, thanks again to Ella from Portland, Oregon, for sharing with us, how happy she felt about meeting her baby sister. And thank you, Dr. Lockhart, for letting us remember and understand what happiness is, how important it is to feel that emotion, understanding ambivalence, a new word that I learned.
And knowing that it's okay to, to feel two emotions at the same time that it's very normal. And it's part of our experience as a human being, emotions are a powerful way for us to understand the world around us and in us, we can learn more about them with a little practice and a little conversation every day.
Thank you, Dr. Lockhart for showing us how we can explore what and how we feel.
Ann-Louise: Of course Nikita. I'm so glad to be here, talking with you about this important topic. And if you want professional help to talk about how you feel, you can find a therapist by doing an internet, and if you want professional help to talk about how you feel, you can find a therapist by doing an internet search and typing in child psychologist near.
You can look up all the different individuals, how close they are, what they do, how they help kids and what ages they help. That's a great place to start.
Nakita: And remember, you are the expert on your emotions.
Ann-Louise: Emotions are really your friend.
Nakita: And you're always allowed to feel what you feel.
Ann-Louise: Let's continue this journey together
[CLOSING]
Nakita: Thanks for joining us today. You can find out more about Dr. Lockhart and her practice online anewdaysa.com and on Instagram at @dr.annlouise.lockhart. You can find my book, A Kids Book About Emotions and other kids' books about important topics at akidsco.com
Ann-Louise: Everyday Feels is written by Nakita Simpson and Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart. Our show is edited and produced by Matthew Winner with help from Chad Michael Snavely and the team at Sound On Studios. Our executive producer is Jelani Memory. And this show was brought to you by A Kids Podcast About.
If there’s an emotion you want to share for us to explore, send us a note at listen@akidspodcastabout.com. And check out other podcasts made for kids just like you by visiting akidsco.com.
Nakita: Until next time.
Ann-Louise: Bye.